To W(B)ed a Bong

The Bedding Diaries of a clueless, soon-to-be Bride

Saturday, November 26, 2005


Woman with 12-month old baby for a half-hour stint in Kerala next Monday. Baby need not be hers but baby should be short for its age. Woman and baby should come to a wedding mandap at a strategic, predetermined moment and claim to have been betrayed by the groom. Food(special cook from chettinad) and accommodation will be provided for the day. If performance is successful, will provide referral letters for other prospective brides. If interested, please email me asap.


Blogger സു | Su said...


12:17 AM  
Blogger Falstaff said...

:-). Am presuming you've read Wodehouse - The Small Bachelor. This is precisely Hamilton Beamish's advice - have a young woman come storming into the wedding saying something about how the groom belongs to her, the woman he has wronged.

7:00 AM  
Blogger Ravages said...


Permit me to better the scene, and add the director's touch

The baby should be crying incessantly, pointing at the groom with one hand and rubbing its running nose with the other
The woman's saree should be reddish, or yellow. it should have more patchworks and quilts than the original material.
You also need a devious uncle kind of person hanging around, who at the right moment, will point at the baby's eyes, look at the groom and say something to the effect of "the baby has the groom's eyes and same running nose the groom has"

add some interesting nadaswaram and tavil music and you are all set to reap box office fortune.

12:30 AM  
Blogger Veena said...

Falstaff - Yes, I have but it was the obscene number of Tam movies I had in mind when I thought of this.

Ravages - I see you have been watching too many movies!

5:04 PM  
Blogger Ravages said...

This is nothing. Leave the wedding arrangement to me and I can assure you much fun. For example, I could arrange for a jeep full of policemen to storm into the mandapam at a tactical time.

Or arrange for Rajnikanth lookalike to say stop (in damil of course) just when the N&T people get to the main part of their song

there's more, but like a prudent business man, I will not tip my hand

9:50 PM  
Blogger s! said...

hehe, runaway bride a la indienne!

10:09 AM  

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